Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
