next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize