We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
