I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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