So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
