i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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