she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
