Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
