She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
