last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
