its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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