i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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