Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
