At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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