all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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