what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i already hear my dad disowning me
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
