either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
stop calling my apartment porn island.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
