and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
