Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
