Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
