If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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