I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize