very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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