Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize