Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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