so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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