Barsexuality is the new black.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I had to cum in my sink.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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