He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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