whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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