theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize