How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize