Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize