Where did you get a picture of my penis
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
