U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
