How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
