I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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