I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
