If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize