Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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