I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
