If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
