it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
