I wish i was in the wii world.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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