David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Holy sore nipples Batman
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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