Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
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