I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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