Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
