They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
ok first of all what the fuck
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
