Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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