Sponge bath it is.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
