saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
