i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
