he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
